That Mall is sick and that Store is dead!

August 17, 2005

"But I Thought We Were Going To See ET Again"

Filed under: 1983 JC Penney & Sears Catalogs — Anita @ 4:24 am

0/~When You’re Bored And Have Nothing Else To Write About, It’s Time To Turn To The 1983 Catalogs Again!o/~

See how I made that into a song? Just put those little makeshift music notes at the beginning and end of each sentence.

Anyways, more horrors from 1983—His And Here’s Red Long Johns, Huge Microwaves, Bert And Ernie Slippers, Barbie Goes Camping, Nightmarish Wallpaper, And How To Ruin Your Kitchen In One Easy Step:

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{JC Penny}Doesn’t this pic just yell 32 year old businessman who brought his 19 year old girlfriend with him to the bosses cabin for the weekend? It looks like he’s telling that losing your virginity isn’t a scary thing. (Hence the reason why he brought her up to the cabin that weekend, and the reason why she bought them matching red long johns)

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{JC Penny}NIGHTMARISH WALLPAPER! I mean my mom told me she loved me 9,000 times already by the time this catalog came out (Keep in mind I was born in 1983, this is why I have these catalogs), but for the parents that just could not tell their kid they loved them, there was the “I [heart] You” wallpaper.

Check out the ‘RAINBOW’ wallpaper, no not the wallpaper with the rainbows on it, but the wallpaper with the actual word RAINBOW on it.

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{JC Penny}
How to ruin your $3,000 cabinetry in one fell swoop! Imagine if you will walking in after a hard days work and seeing your wife with your iron in her hand ironing laminate to the cabinets. What’s up with the beige rattan one? That looks like those shelf liners that also double for a nonslip mat (I forgot the actual term for them, but my mom uses them so her cutting boards stay still)

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I had Bert and Ernie slippers growing up too, but mine had the little plastic heads on them, and once my slippers wore out, dad would cut the heads off the slippers and I’d have Bert and Ernie heads to play with. The Cookie Monster slipper is wearing a chefs hat apparently. Bert’s ears are HUGE in slipper form!

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{Sears}I had a Barbie camper like that! Expect mine was from the 70’s and it was yellow. I loved that thing. That snack bar tent looks interesting though. If they still made that when I was playing with Barbies, I’d want it. Barbie’s own Dominos Pizza couldn’t beat that. (yeah, I had a Barbie Dominos Pizza. I thought it was the coolest Barbie playset ever, sad thing is I got it when I was 11)

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{Sears}The catalog calls this a, “Micro/Convection Oven”, that “combines the speed of a microwave oven with the “hot air” browning of a convection oven.

Did anybody’s parents actually own one of these? I’m dying to know if someone actually made a ham with it or a turkey.



  1. That looks dangerously like my great grandma’s old Microwave. That thing lasted YEARS. Unfortunately in that house hams and turkeys were cooked in ovens.

    Barbie playsets! I had a Hawaiian hut, Hot dog stand, Ice cream shoppe, McDonalds, Rockers stage, and Skipper dorm room.

    Comment by ellez — August 13, 2009 @ 3:16 pm | Reply

  2. My wife’s Grandfather had that model of Microwave. It was made by Sanyo in Japan and built like a tank.
    When he passed away his wife told me that they spent a bundle on it but never used it. It sat on the countertop for years under a cover without ever being turned on. Weird, huh?
    They gave it to us when the house was cleaned out for sale and by my estimates it had about 30 minutes of use (I’m not kidding) in over the 23 years they had it. We used it as intended for several years until a kitchen makeover included a new over the range model. It worked very well and did cook as advertised using a probe and enough buttons to launch a spaceship.
    1980’s microwave ovens were either simple to use (one knob) or outrageously complex (electronic controls) but was ugly as sin with that faux woodgrain finish.
    We donated it to a local church where they use it to reheat potluck dinners.

    Comment by James — November 20, 2010 @ 8:56 pm | Reply

  3. I have that microwave right now and I LOVE it!!!! My husband and I bought it used in Colorado (we are now in MS) back in 1996. I think I will cry when it ever dies!

    Comment by Sarah Howell — November 26, 2016 @ 7:48 am | Reply

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